Me: No. You need to listen to me. I don’t have time to deal with this now.
2 yo: (louder) Look at me. Listen to me. (Stomps foot)
Me: Listen here, I am in charge. We have to grow up. I have things I need to do, places to be. Expectations to fill. You don’t understand so just stop this and come along. Maybe later we can talk…
2 yo: NOW! NOW! NOW! (getting louder)
Me: You’re being ridiculous and stubborn. People are watching. You’re making a fool of me. Now just calm down, we’ll talk later, I promise.
2 yo: You always say that. You never do. (sits down, crosses arms) I’m not moving.
Me: Oh damn it all! I don’t have time for this. (grabs hand to start dragging her along)
2 yo: (screaming) Let go! You are hurting me!
Me: No, I’m not. If you’d just listen I wouldn’t have to drag you. You’re just being a stupid little girl. You have no idea about real life and responsibilities. I do, and life just sucks sometimes. It isn’t fair.
2 yo: (crying harder, whimpering) You’re hurting me, stop…
Me: (screaming) Oh just grow up will you!
2 yo: (whimpering) No. I just want you to listen to me.
Me: Oh go to your room! You can come out when you are ready to cooperate.
2 yo slinks back to the dark recesses of my soul. I can still hear her whimpering and sobbing. I carry that weight with me everywhere I go. It drags me down. Every once and awhile she comes out again, trying to get me to listen but I am too busy, too proud, too wounded to hear.
I think it’s time to listen and to be heard…